What it Means to Be an Ally

Case in Point

A few weeks before the Iowa Legislature passed a bill removing gender identity from the Iowa Civil Rights Act, I’d been asked to contribute to an article about diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) initiatives and the importance of being an ally in the workplace. Donald Trump had only been in office a short time at that point. Still, he was already wreaking havoc on women, minorities, and the LGBTQ+ community, among so many others, through a multitude of executive orders.

When I finally sat down to write the piece, the words wouldn’t come. Was it writer’s block? Procrastination? A lack of ideas? I sat with the blank page for a while only to realize that anger and frustration were all I could muster. I had no idea how to put my true feelings into words because nothing made sense. How could I write anything about DEI when the colorful fabric of our country – and our state – was being bleached white?

A few years ago, I started giving my time to organizations that were pushing back on what appeared to be cruel, misguided, “culture war” issues. As an ally and advocate for the LGBTQ+ community, it was absurd to me that legislators would spend precious time and resources railing against such a small segment of Iowa’s population. Then came an avalanche of anti-LGBTQ+ bills.There were book bans and drag bans, bathroom bills and bills that banned folks from talking about sexual orientation and gender identity in school, bans on gender-affirming care, DEI, etc. The worst of them all, the Civil Rights Removal Act, was proposed, debated, passed, and signed into law in less than a week in early 2025.

As a once proud Iowan and mom to a queer child, it saddens me to see how far we’ve regressed. This isn’t the Iowa I grew up in. It’s not the Iowa I promised my kids, and it’s certainly not a place they’ll want to call home after college. Hateful legislation doesn’t make Iowa feel welcoming or safe for anyone who identifies as LGBTQ+ anymore, and it should come as no surprise that young, educated, ambitious Iowans are leaving the state post-graduation, determined to make their mark somewhere other than here.

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How to Be an Ally

As an advocate, I often get asked, “How do we make Iowa a livable place for those who can’t or don’t want to leave?” And while there’s no right answer, the best I can muster is this: In all facets of your life, be an ally. Allyship is about using your privilege to actively support and uplift marginalized groups through action and ongoing effort. In practice, allyship can look like:

Giving to and volunteering with organizations that provide direct services to LGBTQ+ individuals, such as mental health counseling, legal aid, and housing assistance.

• Forming coalitions with allied organizations, such as civil rights groups, religious and business organizations, and health care providers.
• Supporting LGBTQ+ events and initiatives that increase visibility and promote understanding.
• Encouraging LGBTQ+ individuals to share their stories and experiences.
• Providing resources and training to schools, businesses, and community organizations on LGBTQ+ issues.
• Combating misinformation and stereotypes about LGBTQ+ individuals.
• Promoting and patronizing businesses that are owned and operated by LGBTQ+ individuals or supporting allied businesses.
• Advocating for workplace equality by implementing inclusive policies and practices.

Above all, allyship requires educating yourself so you can pass that education along to others. It’s a small step toward social change, a stronger sense of community, and safer spaces for LGBTQ+ individuals, but one that has a lasting impact on those experiencing discrimination and marginalization, especially in the state they call home.